Get Smart -- Preshow and Postshow

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I'm going for the Margaret Meade look OK, I'm ready for my ice cream now Directors and actors -- who needs 'em Led Zepplin they're not... Bet you wish you could make your eyes do that! No, this is how I REALLY look! It's just theatre, It's just theatre, It's just theatre... It's just theatre, It's just theatre, It's just theatre... OK, who sat on my wall hanging? Exactly 37 tongue lengths! Now what other body parts do you want me to measure with? Whadda you mean my knees are supposed to leave the ground too? Give me a better part, or I attack you from the "crippled goose" pose... It was the 60s! I guess you had to be there... OK, can I do the standing broad jump without ripping this skirt up the back? Nope, guess I couldn't. Good thing this coat was around! Tryouts for the Peaches and Herb lookalike contest No, neither of us can sing! And we don't look like Peaches or Herb... 20 minutes of this every evening and I might make it to 6 feet by the time I'm 20 Now let me guess -- is it the Mad Cardiologist? Norasferatu This would be a whole lot funnier if they'd actually put something in my hair! It's, it's, it's... the abominable cameraman! Relaxing in the press booth Looks dislocated to me I just can't stand any more excitement! Phil's asleep AGAIN!